I have no idea why, I always felt protective with J's around. With her around, I know everything gonna be fine. Yet, when she's not around I felt fears and having negative thoughts in mind. Well, maybe I'm relying on her too much. Yet, that make me Harder to depends on my own feet. But yet I know that, not all the things she's able to give a lending hand. But with her around, I don't feel fears. As I know that she's gonna give me encouragment, even if she's unable to do anything. Even if she did not mention anything. Her face can tell me, everything.
Well, I know myself well. I've serious attitude problem at times. Yet, that lead me to alot of trouble like having fights with my lovely ones. I don't know why, I've change alot since the incident I almost lost a good friend in SGH's. It's true that I change only for someone precious to me in life. I can't deny that, I never change for J's. Yet, I guess I've not put enough effort in it. And I'll do my very best, cause I always believe J's deserve to have that part of me. All I need is peace this few days. I hope there is nothing pissing me off. That might lead me to showing attitude. Somehow I just don't understand why human-being be more less realistic? Or maybe, have thoughts for other too. Well, I just have to know that, human being can be scary at times. C: But with J's around she gonna make my day.
Thinking back on, how we started on this relationship. To me I felt pure and indecent. And yah, as times goes by it felt more like use to having each other everyday. God bless, that this will never end.
Sometime tears are words that heart can't express. And it's hurt me each time looking at her cry. It might be ages a time. Yet, I never fail to cry with her. Cause it's breaking my heart into two. And this is a word for my dearest, live your life to the fullest! I love you, whole heartily. This I promise you.
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